Twitter, Twitter, Twitter.
Truth be told, I spend a very large portion of my workday on Twitter and the only way I can justify it is by insisting that I’m conducting research for my monthly roundup of funny tweets.
So, with that in mind, here’s the funniest tweets I saw in April.
Radio on at 6am n they were going thru the paper looking for lies, I forgot it was April fools day and just assumed it was a normal segment
— deemcdonnell .biz (@deevseverything) April 1, 2016
I want a kiss cam at my funeral
— Dan Duvall (@lazerdoov) April 2, 2016
I assume this was the last of the Famous Five books. pic.twitter.com/WaRpAPKXXL
— Will Stevens (@teletextpage152) April 3, 2016
Imagine carrying a child in your womb for 9 months only for it to grow up and take the lower offer on The Chase
— Simmey (@simmey__) April 4, 2016
Applications are now open for this year’s X Factor. pic.twitter.com/hxpzeG4gZe
— Silly Old Daniel (@sillyolddaniel) April 5, 2016
Undertakers are faceswapping with our dead loved ones as we speak.
— ℳustardCreams (@MustardCreams) April 10, 2016
Just some of the vile and hurtful abuse I receive from online internet haters. pic.twitter.com/StzV6OQlzg
— Sir Michael (@Michael1979) April 11, 2016
Mostly dealing with headaches. pic.twitter.com/308aAOudIb
— Keith Walsh (@KeithWalsh2fm) April 13, 2016
hey boy
are you the front door of the mater hospital
because you are SMOKIN’— Rebecca Keane (@rbcakn) April 13, 2016
“Jumper, this is my shirt from Penneys; Shirt, this is my jumper from Zara.” pic.twitter.com/KOKWJXuqw0
— Annie Whitmore (@Annie_Whitmore) April 14, 2016
A guy asked for my number last night!! (after I backed into his car)
— Nikki Glaser (@NikkiGlaser) April 14, 2016
Oh damn, I don’t think Jay Z will ever recover from all these embarrassing Beyonce lyrics about him: pic.twitter.com/WR84W2mJlQ
— Pixelated Boat (@pixelatedboat) April 24, 2016
Beyoncé accused Jay-Z of cheating on her, but it’s exclusively on Tidal so we can’t assume he’s even seen it yet
— Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) April 24, 2016
BREAKING: Woman realises she has hands. pic.twitter.com/HnASe2R6oh
— BertNews (@bertnews) April 26, 2016
Love this last comment on Patrick Dempsey’s (McDreamy’s) Instagram page after he posts a photo of his new wheels! pic.twitter.com/KSMRgYHPnn
— Ciara King (@iamCiaraKing) April 27, 2016
I’d like to meet the person who ticks the last one. pic.twitter.com/0FUTuJffxW
— Dorothy Cotter (@eleventyfour) April 27, 2016
shit, barbara …the body’s gone!! pic.twitter.com/SQYvB4pRUr
— Sylvnianans (@Sylvnianans) April 28, 2016
this is my university everyone ???????? pic.twitter.com/5wxdBRfDTB
— Lynsey Harradence (@lharradence) April 26, 2016
Happiness, ranked:
3. Graduation
2. Birth of first child
1. Woman you admire tells you, unsolicited, that you nailed your winged eyeliner— Chloe Angyal (@ChloeAngyal) April 17, 2016
Tom Hardy always looks like he’s charging his phone across the room and he just saw someone almost touch it pic.twitter.com/2lIIGEh1dZ
— Matt O’Brien (@matt_obrien) April 21, 2016
Check out January, February and March’s funniest tweets, along with the best tweets of 2015 here and here.
