Parent sex is a topic that’s rarely talked about, maybe because, let’s face it, it rarely happens.
And while we can always appreciate the merits of a good quickie, it’s not quite the same after the hundreth quickie in a row.
Well one woman has taken to Facebook to get people talking about the topic, and it turns out, people really want to talk about it.
Thirty-two-year-old blogger and mum-of-four Constance Hall penned an incredibly candid piece about sex after kids, and it has clearly hit home with a lot of people.
The post, which has been shared over 21,000 times and has 84,000 likes, begins: “We had parent sex yesterday”.
She goes on to describe exactly what this entails, including her husband’s seduction technique which includes pointing at the bedroom with one hand on his crotch.
Charming.
Her post in full reads:
We had “parent sex” yesterday.
You know what parent sex is, it’s that 3.5 minutes you get in between changing nappies and making food,
where you notice that all of your kids are pretty distracted,
Where you realise it’s been almost a month since you banged and are starting to feel like flat mates,
Where your husband’s seduction consists of one finger pointing towards the bedroom and the other hand on his dick,
Where you position the bed to have one foot against the door because for a loud bunch of kids, yours can be pretty quiet when they’re sneaking up on people,
Where no matter how hot it is you chuck the doona on top of yourselves in case someone manages to barge through and catch mummy and daddy doing “yoga” in bed,
It’s a pretty romantic scene really, listening to Iggle Piggle in the background, knowing your days are numbered when you here the add break.
Men are amazing and impressive creatures, by sheer determination, it’s inspiring how one can manage to “finish” under such circumstances, us women, aren’t always so easy.
All the while gleefully thinking about how much of a sex goddess, vixen you are and how your fella is finally going to stop being an arse for at least a whole day.
Well mine was pretty impressed, even if I just lied there, saggy boobs, baby belly pouch, hairy minge and all, he still thinks I’m amazing.
We had “parent sex” yesterday. You know what parent sex is, it’s that 3.5 minutes you get in between changing nappies…
Posted by Constance Hall on Tuesday, 5 January 2016
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