Share This… Not Your Oats & More
She loves you like a mother, but spoils you more and questions you less. Let’s hear it for the grannies!
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Eat It, Eat It Up!
Grannies are feeders. So when you’re at their house, expect to be loaded full of homemade brown bread and apple tart, all washed down with about ten cups of tea.
Don’t Talk Back To Your Mother
Mother was trained under granny’s eagle eye, so she’ll be damned if you grow up lacking manners. Behave yourself.
Don’t Tell Your Mother
Often said while shoving a sneaky fiver into your pocket. WIN!
You’re A Grand Big Girl
The worst ‘compliment’ you could ever hear.
Be Quiet, Coronation Street Is On
The programme may vary, the sentiment does not. Every granny had one television show that you may not open your mouth during. If you do, there better be a damn good reason.
I’ll Say A Prayer For You
Granny believes in the power of prayer, whether it’s in relation to your exams, you job, a move or any other life plans/changes in your sights. Don’t mention you only go to mass at Christmas; you’ll break her heart.
Is Santy Coming?
Doesn’t matter if you’re four or twenty-four, if there’s a lapse in conversation it is perfectly acceptable to bring up Santa.
I Hardly Ever See You
The guilt trip. No one gives it better than granny.
Did You Hear Who’s Dead?
The obituaries column is a regular source of news. And no matter how much you insist you didn’t know the person, she’ll find some connection.
Throw Some More Turf on That Fire
Might be the middle of the hottest July we’ve ever enjoyed. No matter, a roaring fire is the centre of granny’s world, and you better not be the one to let it out.
