1997 was a big year.
Princess Diana called for an international ban on landmines, Tara Lipinski became the world’s youngest women’s world figure skating champion at 14, NASA’s Pathfinder probe landed on Mars and Spice World was released.
Here’s 8 things that Spice World taught me.
1. Bus Sizes Are Deceptive
It’s that classic saying – you can’t judge a bus by its outside dimensions. Spice World tried to pull the wool over our eyes with their exaggeration of the interior size of a bus. The maximum permissible length of a double-decker bus in the UK is 49ft 3in and 14ft 4in high. This simply does not equate to the inside area that Spice World is boasting, with five personal areas and a balcony.
2. Fashion Is All About Confidence
Spice World taught me that you can literally wear a space suit and nobody will question it. Scary Spice wears an outfit that is suitable for space exploration during the film and she was neither mocked nor queried on her particular choice of attire. She even teamed it with mini buns in her hair – revolutionary!
3. Aliens Haven’t Quite Adapted To Our Way Of Life
The media has thoroughly lambasted alien abductions in the past, so Spice World came along at a time where they could’ve dispelled any myths associated with the process. Unfortunately, the aliens couldn’t help themselves when they came into contact with their heroes, with one of the lads really letting himself down by trying to touch Scary Spice’s boob.
4. High Heels And A Dress Are Perfectly Acceptable Bootcamp Attire
Posh Spice always knew she’d make a sizeable dent in the fashion industry, look at the absolute cut of her there in an alarmingly tight dress and high heels. She’s at boot camp for Christ’s sake. The other girls played ball and adopted the unflattering camouflage jumpsuits, but sure Posh had to be different didn’t she? The divil.
5. Gravity Doesn’t Occur On The Spice World Bus
Baby Spice was able to gently rock back and forth on her delicate little swing, while Scary and Ginger Spice could enjoy a game of chess. AS IF. There’s no logical way you’d get the planning permission to modify the bus in such a way that it could successfully defy gravity. Folks, we were lied to.
6. It’s Perfectly Acceptable To Go To Bed With A Full Face Of Makeup
Sleepovers are an essential part of any tween’s life. Spice World taught us that we should wear weirdly sexy negligee among our peers, whilst caked in a full face of makeup. Don’t even think about washing that off before bed! If the Spice Girls can willingly clog their pores, why can’t you?
7. Meat Loaf Is A Fantastic Driver
We’re aware that he can sing, but how good is Meat Loaf at successfully maneuvering a double-decker bus around the UK? Thankfully, Spice World answered that question and then some. Meat Loaf got their pregnant Asian friend to the hospital to deliver her baby with hours to spare. [As a bonus, we also learned that Posh Spice can drive almost as well as she pouts].
8. Special Effects Aren’t An Integral Part To A Movie
Neither is acting, apparently. Look, the girls did their best and Spice World will forever be known as a cinematic masterpiece. Thank you girls.
[All images via Netflix]
