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21st Nov 2013

10 Things… You Only Do When You’re Drunk

Admit it, it's really only when you're drunk...

Sue Murphy

Drink can have a strange effect on people, it can turn the nicest people on earth into monsters, it can make the quiet loud, it will make you do things you never thought you would be able to do. Here are ten things you will only do when you are drunk…

1. Dance like Britney Spears.

After that seventh tequila, you BECOME Britney! You ARE Britney.

2. Wander off by yourself.

Sure, that shiny thing over there takes my fancy. I’ll have a bit of a wander for myself. It doesn’t matter that I am in a foreign country that I do not live in. Where…. am I?

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3. Eat enough take away to last a week.

I’ll have one of those, and one of those and some chips. OH! And some curry sauce. And just about everything on the menu. WAIT! I’m a vegetarian…

4. Sing like no one is listening.

Karaoke? Right this way… Only dogs can hear you now.

5. Make friends with strangers.

Hi random new pal in queue, we are going to be friends. Well, at least for the next ten minutes until we get into the venue. BESTIES!

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6. Turning enemies into friends.

No, I love YOU! I was a wagon, not you! You’re amazing. Sure, I’m just jealous.

7. Crying over… nothing.

“What were you crying over last night?”
“No idea.”

8. Start a fight.

WHAT did you just say about my earrings? I DO NOT LOOK LIKE PAT BUTCHER! *SLAP*

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9. Sharing makeup in the bathroom.

Hello, random pal of random pal in the queue, do you have some eye liner? Or, you know, lipstick?

10. Taxi conversations.

… and then it started raining. Sure, it’s always raining. And I lost my job. Again. No, you’re right, you just can’t find a job in this country at all. I know, sure, those traffic lights are RIDICULOUS!

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10 Things