When you are in your teenage years, you think you are always going to be the fun-loving, outgoing person that you are, you will party all night and sleep all day and you will always be “cool”. You never think you will become your mother, but we’re here to tell you, you will. Here are thirteen things you will find yourself saying when you’re 30.
1. “Ah no, I’ll stay in”
This only started to happen in your late 20’s but suddenly instead of reaching for the vodka while putting on heels whenever your friends call around, now you’re offering them hot chocolate and a blanket. Nah, I’ll just stay in thanks.
2. “That skirt is too short”
When you were 16, you couldn’t get that skirt short enough, you hiked it up at every opportunity. Now, once it is way too far above the knee, it’s a real no no. Mutton dressed as lamb, I’ll wear this pencil skirt instead.
3. “I couldn’t be bothered putting on make-up”
No honestly, I look fine. Nobody is looking at me.
4. “I live in fear of the hangover”
You NEVER lived in fear of the hangover when you were in your 20’s but suddenly, you have to start planning them into your schedule. I will need to take the day off here in order that I might recover from the five drinks I had. Yes, five.
5. “I’m sorry, I can’t hear you. The music is too loud”
When you were younger, you loved your friends but mainly for their drinking abilities, not for the deep and meaningfuls. Now, you really want to hear what your friend is saying about her wedding. What the hell happened?
6. “There is no way I am wearing heels”
You often looked like Bambi when you were younger, attempting to wear nine inch platforms around the place. Now, you put them on for about thirty seconds, declare “forget this” and put on your “dressy” sandals. Flat sandals.
7. “She’ll get over it”
Oh my god, like, my best friend hasn’t spoken to me in, like, two hours. What will I do? That was at 21. Now you think, ah, she’ll get over it.
8. “I’ll just have the one”
Unfortunately, you actually mean this now. You are just having the one, and then you will get the bus home. Not the night bus, the ordinary bus.
9. “Is that cheap wine?”
It didn’t really matter what type of booze you were drinking when you were younger as long as it had an alcohol level, but now. This wine tastes cheap, it’s too “acidy”. You definitely never said this in your 20’s. More like, does this acid have an alcohol level?
10. “I couldn’t be bothered texting, I’ll just call them”
Oh, lovely flirty conversations and the chats with your mates through your teenage years and into your later 20’s. Now? “Hiya, sorry I couldn’t be bothered texting you back…”
11. “Look are you interested or not?”
Oh, you were all for the flirting and the texts and the “is this happening or not” thing when you were younger, but now? Look are you interested or not, because I just can’t be bothered.
12. “No, they just don’t suit me. I’m not wearing them”
You were a slave to fashion, you didn’t mind wearing those ridiculous tracksuits that had buttons all the way up the side, but now? No look I will wear what is comfortable.
13. “I don’t watch that rubbish”
You really were just a sheep in your past, but you realised you don’t like TOWIE and you have no idea why you are watching it. You love the Big Bang Theory. So go with it…
